Life, Not Always As It Seems. /

Life is not always as it seems or how we think it should be.  

Last year, and half of this year I had a client who came to me saying her plate was “The size of the United States and all the oceans put together.”  After much discussion and several debates, I agreed to work with her on stress management, personal accountability, and improving relationships with colleagues and clients.   My client worked hard and made terrific progress with her goals and even added a few other personal goals that came up for her.

Our sessions ended in May 2016 because we were both feeling positive about the progress she was making.  I keep in contact with my clients via text messages for a bit after their case is closed to make sure they are still working on their courses of action.  Over the summer, my client reported things were going well, she “felt calm, joyful and her relationships with others were growing in a positive manner.”  I must admit this made my heart feel really good.

September 22, 2016 my client died unexpectedly.  When I first heard the news I was in denial and then shock. Then I began to wonder about a few things.

•  I wondered if I had missed a clue she was hoping I would get.  
• I wondered if she had been reaching out because she knew she was dying and I missed it.    
• I wondered if I had added anything positive into her life.
• I wondered if this beautiful vibrant woman could have been sick and not known it.
• I wondered if I had properly served my client.

Last week I spent some quiet time in my office reviewing my case notes for this client.  I looked hard for anything I could have missed with regards to her health.  I thought hard about anything I might have heard and didn’t believe needed to be added to the notes.  I found nothing.

Before I left my office, I read my closing summary for this case.  My client reported her plate now felt like the “size of a dinner plate, and was very manageable.”  A far cry from a plate the size of the entire United States of America and all the oceans.  She reported feeling positive, calm and grateful for her life.  She was happy to be making decision that felt good for her.   She loved nesting in her home, and she now loved creating beauty around her.  

As a Life Coach, my goal is to help people sort through their emotional clutter so they can create the life they want.  I teach clients the importance of having joy in their lives.  I believe a joyful life can only come from within when the head, the heart and the gut are aligned. 

In my book “It’s Your Life, Live It, Love It!  A Guide To Improving Emotional Health”   I write about doing your best.  

Please understand, your best will change from day to day.  On days when you wake up refreshed your best will be different than on days when you wake up with the flu.  You do not have to try to do better than your best.   Just do your best every single day and believe that over time as  you create new habits, your best will get better.  

After reviewing my case notes I realized that my client and I both did our best when we worked together.  when you do your best, it makes it impossible to negatively judge yourself, you will not suffer from guilt, blame, shame, and self-punishment.    

You did not know you were ill until just before you passed.  

You did your best.  You created the life you wanted.  

You brought joy into your life.  I will forever be very proud of you.

May you Rest In Eternal Peace.